October 18, 2012

Trust Issues

It's been quiet around these parts - and that completely belies the pace of our lives. For the past 5 weeks, I have been in and out of town on the road for work.  It's been a challenging 5 weeks, and we're only just halfway through.  This season has certainly given us a greater appreciation for each other and a greater appreciation for our military families who endure much harder and much longer absences than this.  Either way, it's been tough.

I've sat down to write often, but have never really been able to put my feelings to words.  Then, once I was able to, I didn't like hearing the negativity that poured forth.  You see, these last five weeks have been riddled with loneliness and anxiety; and, lest you think we have it altogether (ha!), I'm afraid that this place would have been a broken record of the two.  

But He is faithful. 

And in the exact moment I needed it, He was there. And in the moments when I was sinfully unaware of my need, He was there too.  Encouraging sermons, edifying books, and sweet Scripture have buoyed those days that are particularly dark.  And then, as if that's not enough, He paints skies like these:
I've been reading through Lydia Brownback's book, Trust; and, I came across a quote that has been a lifeline of sorts as I strive to unbuckle this burden of anxiety and lay it at the foot of the Cross.

"Real faith isn't the belief that God will do a particular thing; real faith is the conviction that God is good, no matter what He does and however He chooses to answer our prayers."  - Lydia Brownback, Trust.

All is Grace.  How quickly I forget.

1 Comments:

  1. Hi friend,
    I think of you almost daily--especially, though, on the weekends-- hoping that you are home and that your hours with Cole are stretched to the max. That is a wonderful, WONDERFUL quote. I often get ticked with myself when God sends a blessing my way and my first thought is, "God is so good". And He is. But He is still good when my tire goes flat, or my babies are up every hour in the night, or I hear of another friend with cancer. Why is it that my first thought isn't to cry out "God is so good!" when Steve says, "hey babe, I don't know if we can make our rent this month."

    We need a coffee date! Miss you! Thank you for this encouragement tonight. Hugs to you -- wherever you are tonight! :)

    ReplyDelete

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